Texts From Last Night · ssabmud's Favorites

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ssabmud's Favorites Texts:

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(914): View more from New York

I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.

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(530): View more from California

I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP

Fav 6 1538 800
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(410): View more from Maryland

Bad breakup?

(1-410): View more from Maryland

He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.

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(719): View more from Colorado

I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(828): View more from North Carolina

They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.

Fav 6 1593 822
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(310): View more from California

My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?

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(864): View more from South Carolina

If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.

Fav 11 2762 1240
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(281): View more from Texas

I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.

Fav 5 1808 744
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