Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (989)

Last Night in Michigan (989)

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(989): View more from Michigan

You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.

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(989): You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone. http://tfl.nu/tu9y

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She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.

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(989): She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it. http://tfl.nu/vpoa

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Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.

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(989): Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing. http://tfl.nu/a55j

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I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....

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(989): I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants.... http://tfl.nu/17h8

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I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...

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(989): I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase... http://tfl.nu/38c4

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I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.

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(989): I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed. http://tfl.nu/yar6

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tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition

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(989): tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition http://tfl.nu/yo0y

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I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.

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(989): I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears. http://tfl.nu/w8ll

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So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.

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this is the most serious roommate agreement ever

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(810): So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way. (989): this is the most serious roommate agreement ever http://tfl.nu/m5zb

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Lets go hit some boners bro!

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I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.

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(989): Lets go hit some boners bro! (1-989): I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk. http://tfl.nu/w0yr

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Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in

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(989): Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in http://tfl.nu/tuaf

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hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list

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haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters

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(810): hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list (989): haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters http://tfl.nu/iy12

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I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.

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(989): I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story. http://tfl.nu/i8j1

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I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.

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(989): I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus. http://tfl.nu/jo2t

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I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.

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(989): I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night. http://tfl.nu/dsb1

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Last Night in Michigan (989)

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