Texts From Last Night

Favorite
(530): View more from California

im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(530): im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either. http://tfl.nu/lxlu

Replies (0) Good night (4) Bad night (5) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(971): View more from Oregon

I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.

(509): View more from Washington

you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left

(971): View more from Oregon

goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(971): I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH. (509): you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left (971): goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan http://tfl.nu/bxrp

Replies (0) Good night (20) Bad night (9)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help. http://tfl.nu/c3ar

Replies (0) Good night (11) Bad night (14) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(336): View more from North Carolina

Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(336): Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem" http://tfl.nu/nmt9

Replies (1) Good night (51) Bad night (13) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(515): View more from Iowa

We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place

(1-515): View more from Iowa

I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(515): We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place (1-515): I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck http://tfl.nu/93u8

Replies (0) Good night (53) Bad night (31)
Favorite
(561): View more from Florida

But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(561): But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain http://tfl.nu/nmgo

Replies (0) Good night (45) Bad night (18) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(386): View more from Florida

make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(386): make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions http://tfl.nu/o45u

Replies (2) Good night (68) Bad night (18) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(417): View more from Missouri

He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(417): He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex. http://tfl.nu/n0fj

Replies (0) Good night (14) Bad night (80) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(787): View more from Puerto Rico

Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(787): Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud! http://tfl.nu/y0cl

Replies (2) Good night (137) Bad night (20) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(732): View more from New Jersey

The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(732): The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack. http://tfl.nu/qgyn

Replies (1) Good night (81) Bad night (22) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore. http://tfl.nu/g2ed

Replies (1) Good night (42) Bad night (86) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(734): View more from Michigan

You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(734): You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them. http://tfl.nu/p5zk

Replies (0) Good night (48) Bad night (98)
Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis. http://tfl.nu/6np1

Replies (2) Good night (45) Bad night (118) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(651): View more from Minnesota

I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(651): I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind http://tfl.nu/rbfo

Replies (0) Good night (49) Bad night (57) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(330): View more from Ohio

Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(330): Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative. http://tfl.nu/cyri

Replies (1) Good night (71) Bad night (37) Order T-Shirt

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: