Texts From Last Night

(512): View more from Texas

The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?

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I'm undecided on this one.. Either the greatest or the worst night of this individual's life.

Submitted by TruthHurts on Jul 13, 10 at 2:35pm

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- I am guessing the greatest night but the worst morning-following-the-greatest-night.
  
  Submitted by NotTelling on Jul 13, 10 at 5:16pm
  
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I wonder what they blew on the breathalyser..

Submitted by skootles on Jul 13, 10 at 2:44pm

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these pretzels are making me Firsty

Submitted by firsty on Jul 13, 10 at 3:31pm

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.......after I just tazed you in the face?!

Submitted by Rubes_Carnies on Jul 13, 10 at 2:49pm

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Well, how are you?

Submitted by marcusterry on Jul 13, 10 at 2:34pm

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That's Austin for ya. I love this city!

Submitted by Thrax on Jul 13, 10 at 11:08pm

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- No Austin's terrible. No one should ever visit this place.
  
  Submitted by hayleynewell on Jul 14, 10 at 12:31am
  
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Yeah Texas mofos

Submitted by username154 on Jan 4, 11 at 2:56am

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I would so do you.

Submitted by dididoulastnight on Jul 20, 10 at 12:25am

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Successful night I guess?

Submitted by blaynekep on Jul 13, 10 at 7:48pm

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First! Win!

Submitted by Mattheyou on Jul 13, 10 at 2:37pm

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- Fail. Die in a fire.
  
  Submitted by marsho on Jul 13, 10 at 10:24pm
  
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I get this question all the time... Be it from skydiving, wrecking motorcycles, or just general clumsiness.

Submitted by Masquerade90 on Jul 17, 10 at 11:08am

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My fucking hero

Submitted by NLSPPWNS on Jul 15, 10 at 1:13am

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Getting shot in the face just doesn't go as far as it used to

Submitted by Beaglehead on Jul 13, 10 at 2:54pm

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My new hero..

Submitted by thatguyrobbie on Jul 14, 10 at 2:57am

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I love when people post first comments when they aren't first at all

Submitted by afro on Jul 13, 10 at 2:54pm

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Tigerblood, that's how.

Submitted by smp1109 on Jun 22, 11 at 4:58pm

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yeah im thinkin aquapalooza. go austin

Submitted by kayteakat on Jul 14, 10 at 11:51pm

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I've been there, but with doctors. O love of concussions, and no the next morning was not fun :)

Submitted by whereas34 on Jul 15, 10 at 9:40pm

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Alcohol poisoning is no joke . Not : )

Submitted by superhead on Jul 13, 10 at 2:39pm

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These pretzels are making me firsty

Submitted by layin on Jul 13, 10 at 2:44pm

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Fail!

Submitted by ez_aka_the_one on Jul 16, 10 at 2:21am

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been there done that bro

Submitted by StJimmyGD on Jul 20, 11 at 8:52pm

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Aquapalooza?

Submitted by pinklove on Jul 14, 10 at 8:27pm

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Afro, people say that dumb shit cuz dumb people like you give them the attention they're looking for.

Submitted by jondime23 on Jul 13, 10 at 3:24pm

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Omg.. How am I still alive? After being flamed by marsha...? *gasp... Its a miracle*

Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 14, 10 at 12:09am

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Your wife pumped some of the "dangerous chemicals" out\nOf me is what you should have said

Submitted by mrp1mpin on Aug 2, 10 at 11:26pm

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cops on dirty 6 are the shit

Submitted by pooleatspanda on Nov 12, 12 at 1:32pm

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SUCCESS!

Submitted by awkwardturlte on Jul 14, 10 at 4:37pm

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I assume drinking and driving wreck... NOT COOL!

Submitted by alcamatous on Jul 14, 10 at 2:13am

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(512): View more from Texas

Comments

Submitted by TruthHurts on Jul 13, 10 at 2:35pm

Submitted by NotTelling on Jul 13, 10 at 5:16pm

Submitted by skootles on Jul 13, 10 at 2:44pm

Submitted by firsty on Jul 13, 10 at 3:31pm

Submitted by Rubes_Carnies on Jul 13, 10 at 2:49pm

Submitted by marcusterry on Jul 13, 10 at 2:34pm

Submitted by Thrax on Jul 13, 10 at 11:08pm

Submitted by hayleynewell on Jul 14, 10 at 12:31am

Submitted by username154 on Jan 4, 11 at 2:56am

Submitted by dididoulastnight on Jul 20, 10 at 12:25am

Submitted by blaynekep on Jul 13, 10 at 7:48pm

Submitted by Mattheyou on Jul 13, 10 at 2:37pm

Submitted by marsho on Jul 13, 10 at 10:24pm

Submitted by Masquerade90 on Jul 17, 10 at 11:08am

Submitted by NLSPPWNS on Jul 15, 10 at 1:13am

Submitted by Beaglehead on Jul 13, 10 at 2:54pm

Submitted by thatguyrobbie on Jul 14, 10 at 2:57am

Submitted by afro on Jul 13, 10 at 2:54pm

Submitted by smp1109 on Jun 22, 11 at 4:58pm

Submitted by kayteakat on Jul 14, 10 at 11:51pm

Submitted by whereas34 on Jul 15, 10 at 9:40pm

Submitted by superhead on Jul 13, 10 at 2:39pm

Submitted by layin on Jul 13, 10 at 2:44pm

Submitted by ez_aka_the_one on Jul 16, 10 at 2:21am

Submitted by StJimmyGD on Jul 20, 11 at 8:52pm

Submitted by pinklove on Jul 14, 10 at 8:27pm

Submitted by jondime23 on Jul 13, 10 at 3:24pm

Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 14, 10 at 12:09am

Submitted by mrp1mpin on Aug 2, 10 at 11:26pm

Submitted by pooleatspanda on Nov 12, 12 at 1:32pm

Submitted by awkwardturlte on Jul 14, 10 at 4:37pm

Submitted by alcamatous on Jul 14, 10 at 2:13am

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