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  • Submitted by rawrzzz95 on Jul 16, 10 at 4:20pm

    If I see one more person say "I'm firsty" I'll shove a pretzel soooo far up your ass you'll be able to taste it

    • 44 55
      Submitted by MR_PC on Jul 16, 10 at 5:19pm

      "I'm firsty" is such a great thing to say if you are firsty though.

    • 44 58
      Submitted by firsty on Jul 16, 10 at 5:20pm

      The more pretzels I taste, the Firstier I get! :D

      • 50 62
        Submitted by coxr5 on Jul 16, 10 at 7:18pm

        Is there no admin on here with a ban hammer?

        • 46 70
          Submitted by arthurlux on Jul 17, 10 at 1:06am

          The admins have abandoned us. There is no God. We all we perish in the flames. So to speak.

      • 45 60
        Submitted by Greatness on Jul 16, 10 at 9:30pm

        Firsty your comedy is pure genius never stop

    • 39 60
      Submitted by DrizztDoUrden on Oct 18, 10 at 9:47pm

      Firsty, I can't stop laughing, that was hilarious

  • Submitted by XLSuperman on Jul 16, 10 at 4:41pm

    Agreed firsty sucks cock

  • 90 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 16, 10 at 4:45pm

    Hot

  • 66 53
    Submitted by steelrumor on Jul 17, 10 at 10:20am

    Jenny stfu I bet ur vagina creaks whenever you open your legs

  • 72 67
    Submitted by rogelio666 on Jul 17, 10 at 12:25am

    Firsty is waaaay better better than any of these texts lately. For that, I salute you, Firsty

  • 59 45
    Submitted by misselphaba on Aug 30, 10 at 12:39pm

    Always a proven method.

  • 58 50
    Submitted by lovepink768 on Jul 16, 10 at 4:45pm

    Way to reuse a text.....

  • 59 62
    Submitted by Sethro on Jul 16, 10 at 4:09pm

    as long as it works, guys are fucked it doesnt matter what we do. It's either going to happen or it won't...

  • 62 69
    Submitted by coachness_33 on Jul 16, 10 at 4:09pm

    Wow really? This is an old one..verbatim.

  • 75 97
    Submitted by firsty on Jul 16, 10 at 4:20pm

    this slut is making me Firsty

    • 50 59
      Submitted by Tic on Jul 17, 10 at 2:48am

      Shut the fuck up you annoying little prick

  • 65 78
    Submitted by tagman699 on Jul 16, 10 at 4:04pm

    first

  • 63 77
    Submitted by jac5617 on Jul 16, 10 at 4:41pm

    Slut

  • 56 66
    Submitted by KesJaye on Jul 17, 10 at 2:33am

    Firsty stay away from salty sluts. You're already waay too Firsty.

  • 51 57
    Submitted by jenny8675309 on Jul 17, 10 at 1:35am

    Firsty is firtstolicious... I shall defend your right to pretzels til I do something else... Ummmm fu@k yeah tiny manatee... Loved that post.

  • 62 81
    Submitted by stokedonsurf on Jul 16, 10 at 5:10pm

    i dont get all this Firsty shit.... can someone fill me in

    • 49 71
      Submitted by MR_PC on Jul 16, 10 at 5:16pm

      These pretzels are making me firsty.

      • 52 50
        Submitted by stokedonsurf on Jul 16, 10 at 5:27pm

        oh.. Thanks, that makes since now

        • 53 50
          Submitted by ab4three on Jul 16, 10 at 10:45pm

          its from seinfield

  • 44 52
    Submitted by johnnyk on Aug 22, 10 at 9:26am

    Dibs

  • 51 66
    Submitted by An0n on Jul 16, 10 at 7:24pm

    Agreed with Sethro. We can't act really slutty for help, and any girl I could get by acting slutty are ones to avoid. I may be a whore but even I have my standards.

  • 51 67
    Submitted by KesJaye on Jul 17, 10 at 2:35am

    Rawrzzz95 may I go Firsty? I do hope it's the soft warm pretzels you're using?

  • 44 59
    Submitted by Michguy on Jul 16, 10 at 9:28pm

    Nice move

  • 55 84
    Submitted by SovietPretzel1st on Jul 16, 10 at 4:34pm

    In Soviet Russia, shirts wear sluts. Actually, that's not true. Firsty is a slut though. Fourteenth.

  • 47 69
    Submitted by jenny8675309 on Jul 17, 10 at 2:46am

    Amazing how people get upset over an innocent comment about pretzels... But are accepting of someone telling people to die in a fire... Its like they feel the pretzels are a threat. If you find it boring dont read firstys posts.. But lets not make it into a war ... A pretzel war!!! If anyone should be banned its marsho.

  • 54 83
    Submitted by anonymou on Jul 16, 10 at 4:26pm

    Double post

  • 48 74
    Submitted by mintyshake on Jul 18, 10 at 6:59pm

    Be sure to shave that Snuffalupus if you've been out of commission for awhile- GD bush prolly looks like Don King!

  • 50 78
    Submitted by arthurlux on Jul 16, 10 at 5:15pm

    Where have I seen this before? Oh yeah. http://tfl.nu/y6qj

  • 55 89
    Submitted by ohshitimsorry on Jul 16, 10 at 6:45pm

    call me ;) seven oh sevensixtwoeight2939

  • 44 72
    Submitted by 614m on Jul 16, 10 at 4:10pm

    yeah I think i sent this a few days ago...

  • Submitted by BRiANAA on Jul 16, 10 at 4:07pm

    Im firsty