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Last Night in Washington (425)

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I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?

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you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time

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(425): I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I? (1-425): you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time http://tfl.nu/bm15

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The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...

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Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.

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(206): The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies... (425): Let's let the open bar be the judge of that. http://tfl.nu/ch8t

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Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.

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(425): Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me. http://tfl.nu/edgt

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oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog

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(425): oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog http://tfl.nu/rz7h

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we turned his baptism video into a drinking game

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(425): we turned his baptism video into a drinking game http://tfl.nu/gtee

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if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you

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(425): if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you http://tfl.nu/ohu0

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He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.

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(425): He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me. http://tfl.nu/6hfm

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i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.

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(425): i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life. http://tfl.nu/aawj

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her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.

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(425): her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle. http://tfl.nu/baj8

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couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school

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(425): couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school http://tfl.nu/94oh

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there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..

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(425): there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room.. http://tfl.nu/dpny

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Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.

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(425): Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy. http://tfl.nu/3fjx

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I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.

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(425): I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B. http://tfl.nu/2oen

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Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while

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(425): Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while http://tfl.nu/c37v

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I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.

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(425): I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to. http://tfl.nu/l558

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Last Night in Washington (425)

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