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  • Submitted by NPH9384 on Feb 15, 11 at 2:53pm

    Handjob is the man's job. Blowjob is yo job

    • 59 64
      Submitted by SserPrun95 on Feb 15, 11 at 4:55pm

      I'm saving this one for a favorite just because of this comment, bahaha.

    • 57 69
      Submitted by joe_jr_shabadoo on Feb 16, 11 at 3:15am

      Folk wisdom for the txt generation. You, sir, are a gentleman and a scholar.

    • 63 70
      Submitted by CIT on Feb 16, 11 at 10:35am

      awesome! i've been wondering what's with all the handjob talk on TFLN. Seriously...what's the point?!?!

  • Submitted by ThizzGOBLIN on Feb 15, 11 at 2:35pm

    he has hands. he can give himself a handjob. if you got a vagina job for him, im sure he'll accept.

  • Submitted by lem0n on Feb 15, 11 at 3:36pm

    Handjob? Are we in 7th grade?

  • Submitted by summersalad33 on Feb 15, 11 at 2:22pm

    Maybe you're horrible at handjobs...

  • Submitted by steaksauce on Feb 15, 11 at 2:29pm

    what? I turn em down all the time. who needs em?\nI'll just wait and get that bj later.

  • Submitted by jankage on Feb 15, 11 at 5:54pm

    "Who the fuck wants a handjob?!" - Turtle

  • Submitted by tipsyseattlegirl on Feb 15, 11 at 2:20pm

    What is Jessica Simpson good at hjs I wouldve guessed she was better at bjs

  • Submitted by realist on Feb 15, 11 at 2:17pm

    Bad night and a reality check.

  • Submitted by colan08 on Feb 15, 11 at 4:39pm

    I'd still fuck around with Jessica...there's just more cushion.

  • 94 70
    Submitted by arthurlux on Feb 15, 11 at 4:39pm

    No you're not. Jessica Simpson is fat now, but she's still hot.

    • 63 83
      Submitted by said8ED on Feb 15, 11 at 8:06pm

      She's getting away from hot, but, in her day.......okay, I'm done

  • 84 67
    Submitted by Rasetsu on Feb 17, 11 at 10:00pm

    Jessica is curvy and totally HOT.

  • 85 89
    Submitted by just_s4yin on Feb 15, 11 at 10:28pm

    What self respecting woman gives a hand job?! If there's a job to be done, it's gotta be a BJ. Who wouldn't want to do that for their guy, seriously people!

    • 63 64
      Submitted by ejswimmer on Feb 16, 11 at 12:48pm

      Well I guess if you want lipstick all over your dick...

      • 57 71
        Submitted by TMedStud on Feb 16, 11 at 10:43pm

        Lipstick on my dick...the horror! Nevermind the splooge and spit, no, lipstick is the real problem in giving a BJ.

  • 72 71
    Submitted by Michguy on Feb 15, 11 at 6:56pm

    Might be 6th graders. Lame.

  • 69 68
    Submitted by addiictiive1 on Feb 16, 11 at 6:33pm

    I'll take it

  • 66 72
    Submitted by FuckWhatYouKnow on Feb 15, 11 at 11:34pm

    Hand jobs are for high school..\ni'd fuckin turn down an HJ, i guarantee no other hand can do as well as my own, why waste the time.

    • 57 81
      Submitted by Masquerade90 on Feb 16, 11 at 12:56pm

      Yeah, the main reason I'd be using my hand is foreplay. Or afterplay. Which, with enough afterplay, it becomes foreplay again.

  • 74 91
    Submitted by rotflmfao on Feb 15, 11 at 11:33pm

    Make no mistake.. You will never be Jessica Simpson. She just officially became a billionaire! So good for her if she wants to pack a little more curve.

    • 56 83
      Submitted by joe_jr_shabadoo on Feb 16, 11 at 3:19am

      Whatever she is (fat, lousy at oral, etc.), she's NOT a billionaire. Not even close.

  • 69 85
    Submitted by TH3N355 on Feb 15, 11 at 8:17pm

    I think one major point all of you are overlooking is that OP is fat. That may have something to do with this rejection...

  • 61 80
    Submitted by just_s4yin on Feb 16, 11 at 11:47pm

    @ejswimmer.... Uh, Sorry but I'm the one wearing the lipstick....and if a guy is really that concerned about the lipstick shit then they must not be getting a good BJ at the time! You've obviously had some complaints.... Just sayin.

    • 53 82
      Submitted by ejswimmer on Feb 17, 11 at 11:04am

      You're a guy wearing lipstick... Lovely.