Texts From Last Night · kold2day's Favorites

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kold2day's Favorites Texts:

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(705): View more from Ontario

I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.

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(951): View more from California

Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.

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(207): View more from Maine

You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!

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(619): View more from California

Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(905): View more from Ontario

threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.

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(330): View more from Ohio

she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot

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(913): View more from Kansas

Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?

(1-913): View more from Kansas

I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.

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(630): View more from Illinois

For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"

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