Texts From Last Night · grumpy1718's Favorites

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grumpy1718's Favorites Texts:

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(503): View more from Oregon

Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.

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(815): View more from Illinois

Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people

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(847): View more from Illinois

This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.

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(757): View more from Virginia

I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(630): View more from Illinois

everybody makes mistakes

(1-630): View more from Illinois

i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances

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(912): View more from Georgia

I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.

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(650): View more from California

Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.

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