Texts From Last Night · MXRacer694's Favorites

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

MXRacer694's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."

Fav 17 8268 1526
share tweet
(541): View more from Oregon

Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?

Fav 9 5434 1167
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(908): View more from New Jersey

its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night

Fav 73 1980 5814
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.

Fav 24 3363 1044
share tweet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(425): View more from Washington

My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed

Fav 13 5403 1531
share tweet
(212): View more from New York

??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.

Fav 36 2312 1345
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(818): View more from California

I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.

Fav 28 6587 1013
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.

Fav 8 3106 825
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT