Texts From Last Night · denialtwist's Favorites

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denialtwist's Favorites Texts:

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(513): View more from Ohio

Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.

Fav 8 3472 1413
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(201): View more from New Jersey

the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do

Fav 24 1746 4664
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?

Fav 12 3930 1587
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(214): View more from Texas

I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.

Fav 24 2261 5384
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.

Fav 15 1393 4661
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(206): View more from Washington

My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.

(415): View more from California

Why?

(206): View more from Washington

Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.

Fav 15 2069 4745
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(516): View more from New York

the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY

Fav 14 7168 1605
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(509): View more from Washington

They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.

Fav 17 2451 4698
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