Texts From Last Night · minimew's Favorites

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minimew's Favorites Texts:

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(815): View more from Illinois

Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her

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(309): View more from Illinois

why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??

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(302): View more from Delaware

then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(914): View more from New York

Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it

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(609): View more from New Jersey

my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.

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(562): View more from California

the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.

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