Texts From Last Night · beachbarbie507's Favorites

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beachbarbie507's Favorites Texts:

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(937): View more from Ohio

Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.

Fav 29 1578 6871
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(765): View more from Indiana

So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?

Fav 16 5300 1939
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(651): View more from Minnesota

just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.

(1-651): View more from Minnesota

called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.

Fav 18 6525 1956
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(631): View more from New York

Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...

Fav 11 5207 1803
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