Texts From Last Night · lifeisfunny007's Favorites

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lifeisfunny007's Favorites Texts:

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(907): View more from Alaska

He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.

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(618): View more from Illinois

Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(817): View more from Texas

I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.

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(+06): View more from

We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.

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(647): View more from Ontario

I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS

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