Texts From Last Night

Marse's Favorites Texts:

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  (240): View more from Maryland

  The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!

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  (240): The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different! http://tfl.nu/rsm4
  Replies (5) Good night (1022) Bad night (303) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed

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  (215): If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed http://tfl.nu/cmm2
  Replies (16) Good night (681) Bad night (1304) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls

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  (402): you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls http://tfl.nu/fn2c
  Replies (11) Good night (782) Bad night (3327) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend

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  (208): I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend http://tfl.nu/wdl5
  Replies (13) Good night (3183) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I need to hump something and I know u understand.

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  (843): I need to hump something and I know u understand. http://tfl.nu/eg48
  Replies (3) Good night (1040) Bad night (359) Order T-Shirt
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  (325): View more from Texas

  Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.

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  (325): Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul. http://tfl.nu/ljpv
  Replies (8) Good night (1192) Bad night (303) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.

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  (406): Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid. http://tfl.nu/8if7
  Replies (9) Good night (609) Bad night (1043) Order T-Shirt
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.

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  (985): My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong. http://tfl.nu/gho7
  Replies (7) Good night (1012) Bad night (386) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS

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  (978): I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS http://tfl.nu/o0md
  Replies (2) Good night (957) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.

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  (318): If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists. http://tfl.nu/cuic
  Replies (3) Good night (1461) Bad night (354) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"

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  (519): Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy" http://tfl.nu/ca96
  Replies (6) Good night (2078) Bad night (379) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.

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  (850): I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend. http://tfl.nu/659e
  Replies (12) Good night (2198) Bad night (324) Order T-Shirt
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  (830): View more from Texas

  we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.

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  (830): we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked. http://tfl.nu/50u7
  Replies (8) Good night (2177) Bad night (409) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  My brain says no but my pants say off.

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  (902): My brain says no but my pants say off. http://tfl.nu/syce
  Replies (7) Good night (4901) Bad night (581) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex

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  (402): let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex http://tfl.nu/z1hh
  Replies (13) Good night (2958) Bad night (661) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.

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  (519): It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina. http://tfl.nu/mbje
  Replies (8) Good night (2422) Bad night (542) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat

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  (402): I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat http://tfl.nu/ufc8
  Replies (24) Good night (2248) Bad night (3209) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex

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  (604): I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex http://tfl.nu/9dx2
  Replies (17) Good night (5546) Bad night (1543) Order T-Shirt
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?

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  (575): Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night? http://tfl.nu/drd1
  Replies (9) Good night (3149) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?

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  (845): what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much? http://tfl.nu/y3h1
  Replies (23) Good night (3147) Bad night (445) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.

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  (412): I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not. http://tfl.nu/jtsf
  Replies (14) Good night (7491) Bad night (747) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off

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  (818): Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off http://tfl.nu/wsi1
  Replies (8) Good night (2959) Bad night (461) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.

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  (818): Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested. http://tfl.nu/vry7
  Replies (15) Good night (4669) Bad night (989) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.

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  (973): Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat. http://tfl.nu/ob9t
  Replies (28) Good night (8990) Bad night (817) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I am midnight drunk by noon

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  (773): I am midnight drunk by noon http://tfl.nu/nu2g
  Replies (7) Good night (4417) Bad night (536) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.

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  (313): The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not. http://tfl.nu/y4k4
  Replies (12) Good night (2021) Bad night (5575) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?

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  (516): whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"? http://tfl.nu/wiv5
  Replies (63) Good night (5207) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.

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  (678): I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice. http://tfl.nu/ukpc
  Replies (17) Good night (1225) Bad night (4579) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  you will always have a special place in my vag

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  (828): you will always have a special place in my vag http://tfl.nu/evl8
  Replies (23) Good night (5669) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess

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  (704): oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess http://tfl.nu/vowo
  Replies (3) Good night (591) Bad night (1504) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead

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  (925): Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead http://tfl.nu/949y
  Replies (8) Good night (1235) Bad night (428) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.

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  (215): I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart. http://tfl.nu/liah
  Replies (22) Good night (6843) Bad night (906) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  Be still, my beating vagina.

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  (619): Be still, my beating vagina. http://tfl.nu/qyal
  Replies (22) Good night (4288) Bad night (892) Order T-Shirt