Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(940): View more from Texas

nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again

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(417): View more from Missouri

I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.

(1-417): View more from Missouri

That's because you are an idiot.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(256): View more from Alabama

Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.

(662): View more from Mississippi

Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?

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(631): View more from New York

figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.

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(706): View more from Georgia

I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.

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(351): View more from Massachusetts

I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.

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