so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
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It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
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You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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