Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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