The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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