I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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