I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize