So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize