Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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