Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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