youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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