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  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:39pm

    best five seconds ever?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:32pm

    I once went thirteen years. Then I turned fourteen

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:37pm

    For those who have never had a real dry spell... after the initial "Have to get some, can't live without it" phase wears off, you go into this denial phase where you think you don't have to get some and you can live without it... followed by repeating the initial phase and second phase over and over.

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:25pm

    Over/under on the next time they get laid: 3 years 11 months.

  • 93 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:48pm

    I'm at six months and I'm DYING

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:40pm

    I'm going on 43 years :( I killed a man with a trident once and spent 42 years in prison

  • 94 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:16pm

    im glad im a girl....cause you guys will literally have sex with ANYTHING so i dont ever have to worry about a dry spell.

  • 91 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:22pm

    i think you can consider yourself a born-again after long

  • 79 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 4:42pm

    241: 5 years, 4 months, 3 days and change. But who's counting? Not fat or bad looking. Just socially awkward and weird. shy too.

  • 85 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:37pm

    2:33 stay strong. It was 4.5 years for me (yay dating girls that give up everything but) and my current gf wants it almost more than I do. it's a little exhausting.

  • 78 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 30, 09 at 1:49am

    i thought 3 months felt long

  • 77 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 10:40pm

    GOOD GOD stop having sex at 13. this is insane

  • 80 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:29pm

    That's sad, but I'm proud of you.

  • 82 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:29pm

    That's too long to go without sex

  • 79 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:40pm

    I'm still a virgin, but I'm also still in high school.

  • 68 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:42pm

    SWEET!! how long till your next fuck?

  • 74 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:27pm

    Haven't gotten some in a year and 4 months......

  • 69 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 6:12pm

    2:12, I've found that "knowing what you're doing" is really just being willing to listen to directions. Every woman is different, so other than the basics, you might as well throw what you think you out the window and take advice from the person you're trying to please. It's their body, after all.

  • 76 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:30pm

    I would have offed myself long before that.

  • 69 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:11pm

    don't worry 2:45 your day shall arrive

  • 66 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:01pm

    Good night - bad life? :P

  • 66 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 8:47pm

    7:51 is definitely a virgin

  • 77 86
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:33pm

    I'm going on 5 years. Fvck it's frustrating. Where's all these sluts my friends sleep with?

  • 66 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:15pm

    I'm about 7 months in. Also, definitely not fat or ugly. I just have self respect. Still dying. My heart goes out to you, OP. I hope you keep getting laid by the same person. :)

  • 70 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:29pm

    Sad for you, but I don't get what the big deal is about sex. It's just SEX!

  • 62 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 7:39am

    Hahaha I get more ass than u as a kid

  • 62 63
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 6:07pm

    9:44 - It's actually a myth that lots of sex makes you loose. Having a kid or getting fisted a bunch, sure. I fuck my wife at LEAST twice a week, sometimes every day, and she just keeps getting tighter :D

    • 33 51
      Submitted by DonkeyLipps on May 2, 12 at 4:48am

      my ex gf was the same way. im slightly above average in size length wise but a lot in girth and we had sex just about everyday. she never told me if she did anything special to stay tight, i think it was her little secret she liked to keep from me.. but every time we had sex it felt like it was the first time. it was fantastic! sometimes i swore it had gotten even tighter and all she would do is just smile and giggle. the only downside from her being that tight is that she would get sore from time to time.

  • 77 93
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:44pm

    Crazy? Right... I just don't see why everyone is so obsessed with it. I'm not trying to be a sleazy, STD-ridden slut--especially at sixteen. Besides, I value the fact that I'm unbelievably tight--and whoever I end up sleeping with will too. How many of you sleazy whores can say the same thing?

    • 53 74
      Submitted by WTFmate on Aug 20, 10 at 1:53am

      Actually, the vagina is elastic so unless you have a child it doesn't ever get 'loose', that's a misconception. Also, you can do exercises to strengthen the muscles in the walls. But seriously, my little sister is 16 so for the love of god THANK YOU FOR BEING A VIRGIN so I can continue fooling myself into thinking that 16-year-olds don't have sex.

  • 68 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 4:59pm

    I'm almost at 3 years, hoping to get laid soon

  • 66 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:04pm

    If you go that long without getting laid chances are good you're fat and/ or ugly.

  • 69 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 5:12pm

    that sucks i went a week and a half and wanted to die!

  • 66 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:34pm

    My man went a year and a half without because a frigid exwife and now he fucks me every day, mulitple times a day.

    • 46 61
      Submitted by bananabear on Mar 26, 10 at 4:08pm

      congratulations? would you like a cookie?

  • 62 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:24pm

    I agree 3:16... men want it so bad it is easy to be chosey, and still not have a dry spell.

  • 61 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 3:55pm

    21 year old virgin? that is so fucken lame dood. You couldnt be more pathetic. not all girls are sluts, if you really have the game you can get away with murder.

  • 68 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:56pm

    I can understand counting years, months and maybe even weeks, but if you are counting the days and hours, that's is probably half the reason you're not getting any. /pathetic

  • 76 96
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:51pm

    2:45... You are probably ugly.

  • 66 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 11:34pm

    9:44, you sound a lot like me when I was 16. You'll change your tune when you hit college. Guaranteed. Don't preach about what you're too young to understand.

  • 63 71
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:42pm

    9:29, you've obviously never had good sex.

  • 64 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:41pm

    Five years, two months, 27 days, ten hours and still counting; fml. I would say you can all go fuck yourselves, but, you know.

  • 61 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 29, 09 at 11:28am

    how much did u have to pay

  • 64 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:57pm

    @2:51, lol, great movie :)

  • 59 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 9:30pm

    if any of my male friends had gone that long i'd sleep with them just to end the desert. or at least i'd pass them off to one of my friends..

  • 64 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:45pm

    And it's worth the wait for real men. Not to mention why would you sleep around with all these people.

  • 61 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:09pm

    It's been 4 or 5 days for me.... This sux

  • 67 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:07pm

    Feel so much better about 2.5 years. Phew. Thanks.

  • 60 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:38pm

    I'm sorry. Very sorry.

  • 54 58
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 18, 09 at 12:52pm

    U got the days down? After awhile I stopped counting, I just know it's a little over 2 years

  • 65 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 6:59pm

    This guy totally plays World of Warcraft.

  • 53 57
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 7, 10 at 6:42am

    2 mins ago and before that 13 hours ago. You are slacking

  • 62 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 30, 09 at 1:54am

    At 9:30 may I be your friend please!!!

  • 57 65
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:59pm

    hahahahahahahaha is all i can say to the responses

  • 59 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:45pm

    3:43 jody is holding her right now

  • 63 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:03pm

    2:44 that's how you get laid and you talking smack?

  • 60 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 12:43am

    Patty? Is this you?

  • 57 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 12:09am

    9:29....sex is gods one good win

  • 58 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:13pm

    It must suck to be a guy! Lol at least I hope it's a guy!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:45pm

    i'm 21, never been kissed, let alone a virgin..... i don't feel the least bit bad for you.

  • 61 76
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 10:44pm

    hahahaha finally a good tfln

  • 56 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:33pm

    Haha trust YOU to say that 9:29, you crazy cootch!!

  • 63 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:51pm

    Why is it such a big deal to guys to get laid, I mean seriously, it's just sex, you will b fine without it, why would you count? That's your first problem

    • 55 61
      Submitted by fallopianfungus on Feb 5, 10 at 4:37am

      you have obviously never had a good fuck before

  • 64 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:45pm

    good work 2:44. enjoy herpes

  • 62 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 3, 09 at 1:34am

    still a virgin. I win.

  • 55 67
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:37pm

    I *ACTUALLY* feel bad for you

  • 55 68
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 1:09pm

    Almost 18 years... So, once I seethe girlfriend or the girl on the side... It's on...

  • 54 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:35pm

    dude they are called hookers,, not that i would go to that level. 4 years not yessss, but nooooooooooooooooo!!!!

  • 60 80
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 22, 10 at 8:24am

    But who's counting?

  • 57 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:07pm

    man and i thought i was bad, its been exactly a month for me today.. but hopefully im gettin laid this weekendddd cheaaaaa suckaaas

  • 63 87
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 5:08pm

    Dear God I'd open fire on a crowded shopping mall if I didn't get laid for that long. Seriously. There would be no survivors.

  • 50 62
    Submitted by Anonymous on Feb 15, 10 at 1:54am

    Me and my girlfriend used to have sex..then we both decided to wait till we were married to do it anymore...FML

  • 52 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 28, 10 at 3:22am

    3 years, 5 months and 3 days, until very recently. I FEEL your pain. High five!

  • 52 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 11:41pm

    I know just what the OP is talkin bout. Until about five months ago I had been on a four-and-a-half-year dry spell. Girlfriends change that. Now I get some twice a day. Beautiful.

  • 47 57
    Submitted by Bootscity69 on Dec 12, 10 at 6:46pm

    Congratulations

  • 53 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 8, 09 at 10:37pm

    11/3--1:34, same. Haha.

  • 57 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:39pm

    Two words: Fat Chick

  • 25 14
    Submitted by jovy on May 25, 13 at 4:11pm

    I once went without sex for just over 3 years, not because I'm hideous or a 'loser', I had opportunities but I CHOSE not to. Sometimes not having sex can be good for you. (and yes I find it easy enough to get laid now I've decided to again)

  • 55 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:17pm

    What were in jail for? I guess that prison reach-around doesnt count as sex...

  • 52 69
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:42pm

    I don't know if this should be a thumbs up or down

  • 49 64
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 2:54am

    Throw a party! No b.s. Because I would :D

  • 57 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 29, 09 at 10:05am

    it's been 12 day's......

  • 53 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 6:42pm

    Wow guys, it's been 3 months, 5days and 2 hours for me, I thought I had it bad. You guys make me feel so good.

  • 51 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 5, 10 at 8:04am

    It's called Game and you ain't got it

  • 51 70
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 10:23pm

    I haven't got laid for 14 years, 8 months, and 5 days! o.O

  • 42 53
    Submitted by bestueverhad on Mar 22, 11 at 12:41am

    Best 30 sec of my life

  • 54 77
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 2:12pm

    21 years and counting. and I've actually had a steady girlfriend for the past 2 years, she just refuses to give it up. Im not ugly either. i find a lot of girls who are willing to give it up to me, I'm just scared to be with a girl thats not a virgin too on account of i wont know what im doing.....smh this sucks.

  • 57 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:01pm

    You Poor Baby!!!! Im so sorry...I know I crawl up the wall after just a couple days!! Thank God for boyfiends!! Cheer up tho...I bet youre a hell of a lot cuter with a smile on your face than with a frown.

  • 58 85
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:33pm

    7:32 win! Haha your amazing.

  • 54 78
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 31, 09 at 2:20pm

    well I'm 21 and I'm still a virgin I'm jus waitin for marriage soon next yr it's better cause it's crazy out there in this world guys are crazy they don't care who they sleep with but the important thing is their penis and jus throw the girl like she's nothing it's jus sad... girls seriously whoever out there is virgin jus wait until your married I swear it's better

  • 61 92
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 30, 09 at 7:47pm

    Man I'm 17 and gettin laid like every other day haha, your dick must be small.

  • 45 61
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 11, 10 at 5:35pm

    Fail

  • 55 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:29pm

    Shit and I'm going crazy and it's been five months !

  • 55 81
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:00pm

    How did you live?!?!?

  • 48 68
    Submitted by anu on Jan 16, 10 at 6:44pm

    How fubar are you 3:16?

  • 47 66
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 1:10am

    Who would vote this a bad night? The dude just broke a dry spell. Sounds like a good night to me.

  • 51 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:54pm

    2 years, 2 months.. not pathetic enough to count the days and hours buuuut im a girl so it's really just been a choice

  • 51 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:43pm

    Ever heard of the military...I can't live with my girl andam going to be deployed in a little while...it's been over a year and when I get back from deployment it'll be 1 year 8 months.

  • 55 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:32pm

    I feel like this text was turning someone in to be called a loser more than it was actually funny...

  • 51 75
    Submitted by Anonymous on Mar 13, 10 at 5:29am

    I'm dyingnafter 2 weeks!!!

  • 59 91
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jan 24, 10 at 8:50pm

    Ive never had sex and im 52. Theres nothing wrong with it. I actually dont want to have sex. Its disgusting. You are putting part of your body into someone else. Repeatedly...in and out and in and out. Gross.

  • 49 73
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 2, 09 at 4:14am

    Like my daddy says try before you buy.... -kimma law I don't like being known as anonyomous

  • 55 85
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 9:55pm

    I bet 9:44 is a butterface.

  • 58 91
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 4:59pm

    why is anyone trying to make these losers feel good or normal? The OP isn't getting laid because he/she is damaged goods. Socially awkward is damaged goods. These losers aren't getting fucked but they sure are fucked up. Tell them the truth

  • 54 83
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:33pm

    Sad dude.. totally sad.

  • 55 86
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 2, 09 at 2:58am

    2:21-Waiting is not worth it! You test drive a car before you buy it right? Same thing. No one wants to marry someone whose bad in bed. Having sex before marriage doesn't make you a slut. It makes you experienced and worth fucking! I'd rather taste the milk before I buy the cow!

  • 53 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 7:13pm

    1month, 3 days, 6hrs. Dude is probably married with a frigid wife like the rest of us.

  • 19 17
    Submitted by infinitescratch on Jun 21, 13 at 7:12pm

    but hey whos counting?!

  • 42 63
    Submitted by fmhsbaseball on Sep 21, 10 at 11:30am

    Ahahah 7 32 same here

  • 26 33
    Submitted by LolBen on Oct 16, 12 at 10:09am

    It's been like... 12 hours for me...

  • 46 74
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 28, 09 at 6:32am

    sooo, my dad has a 240 number, i feel like this was from him. way to go dad.

  • 51 84
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 12:07am

    I say the OP must be well over 90 years old. It's the only reasonable explanation for such travesty!

  • 36 55
    Submitted by RandomGod504 on Jun 30, 11 at 12:17am

    No wonder ur so busy cow ti g the days sense u last had sex that u forgot to get laid…dumbass

  • 44 72
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 8:06pm

    How long did u last..prolly a whole 2 min lol

  • 47 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 10:36pm

    I went anal on a girl at 13 but she told me it hurt so we went doggy

  • 55 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:05pm

    I got laid last night, and the night before, and beforee, go figure.

  • 51 89
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 4:38pm

    is the OP a guy or a girl?? I got's to know

  • 50 87
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 3:19pm

    Must have been in prison!!!

  • 26 40
    Submitted by MLOVES_T_F_L_N on Oct 7, 12 at 2:12pm

    I feel bad for you đŸ˜¢this makes me sad.. You should never have to wait that long lmao

  • 39 66
    Submitted by armyman on Apr 2, 10 at 9:00pm

    Can I have her number cuz I'm in the same boat

  • 52 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 6:29pm

    You didn't count down to the minutes? Seconds?

  • 44 82
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 17, 09 at 12:57pm

    I just got laid last week for the first time in my life. I'm 28 years old. Beat that bitches!!!

  • 42 79
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 9, 09 at 8:42am

    How many hours minutes and seconds?

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 26, 09 at 2:44pm

    WOW. You people are REALLY pathetic. Just go to the bar and pick the drunkest or most insecure bitch there.... It WILL work!!!

  • 46 95
    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 10, 09 at 12:43pm

    It's 10/26 3:07. 2.5 yr streak over... phew.

  • 42 87
    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 27, 09 at 12:35am

    Virgin 19 years 4 months or somethin like that. I'm not fat very laid back and I might not be the best lookin guy in the world but wellll above others where I'm from (south-west VA) it sux to be allergic to latex!!! On the other hand I have a prince albert and that alone gets quite a bit of attention..