HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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