Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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