Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
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