hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize