What a fucking waste of an outfit
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize