Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize