smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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