hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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