I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize