dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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