you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
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Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
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Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
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