he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
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..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You have to summon your inner elephant
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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