It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
When are your genitals available?
Randomize