You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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