I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize