my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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