I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Randomize