my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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