we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize