What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
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She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
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IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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