Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize