just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize