see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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