It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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